Tuesday, August 11, 2009

*Rest In Peace*

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Stuff have been pretty bad lately...I can't be online for more than an hour on weekdays...I know it sounds shit...I'm feeling so sick...Got exams from next month...n I'm like totally locked down...My parents have been acting really insane...I don't know why they don't trust me...I don't feel like a kid of theirs, It's more like a warden thing at some hostel though I do what I want...I wrote 30 reasons on the wall of my room about why I want to end up my life...most of them are about my "so called parents"...I feel so bad about everything happening around...I just want to escape, anyhow...Sweet escape for me would be Suicide...but I've tried it like a dozen times...n failed all through...Don't try the following, it won't work...

1.Slit wrists
2.Drink Hydrochloric Acid
3.Vaccines
4.Breaking the thermometer in your mouth and taking in the damned Mercury
5.Giving up eating for days
6.Drowning yourself
7.Choking in something
8.30 Sleeping Pills

But self harm is something that makes me feel real...I know I'm not just skin and bones...I've got a soul somewhere inside which is lost in all this fuss...I haven't been writing any poetry from the past week and there's so much ready to be out but than I don't have time for the only thing I love doing...I wanna end up somehow...I recently had a quarrel with my sis because of some personal reasons...and I'm so messed up since than...the only person I didn't expected to change had changed in so many ways..:(...*crying*...I wish some disease torture me to death...seriously, living like this is more torture than just dying in some damned way...I'll be fine than...somewhere in hell with Satan...sounds good to me...!!!...damn, god please kill me...I want to *Rest In Peace*